Who assassinated John F. Kennedy?
A) JFK was killed by the lizard people who are competing for more political power (Obama included).
B) JFK is not dead, he just hid and by eating children is immortal and as fresh today as he was then.
C) The government - who else?
D) I don't care, but I'm sure he's after me too.
A) The alien overlord who will subjugate humanity during the next lunar eclipse.
B) Bono? I KNEW U2 had something to do with this!
C) The government.
D) Everyone except me
Why should you wear a mask during a pandemic?
A) You shouldn't, the mask disturbs the heart chakra, crystals are enough to ward off viruses.
B) Pandemic, plandemic. See the connection?
C) Finally, my chance to overthrow the government completely unrecognized.
D) There is no pandemic, they just want to lock me up.
How many children are born each year? (as of 2020)
A) 82 million children, of which 2 million are human-lizard hybrids.
B) 67 billion
C) Either way, too many democrats
D) That many? Is there even room for me then?
What is the largest continent?
A) The one with the biggest underground tunnel system (built before our time to house the alien human hybrid creatures)
C) Pangea, borders are an invention of the government
D) All except the one I live on
What do they eat for breakfast in Hollywood?
A) Adenochrome-flavoured uranium cereal
B) Whole moose?
C) Only what's allowed - you should be allowed to eat anything!
D) What do you eat for dinner? What do I eat for dinner? What is the point of the question in the first place??
You're the cryptic type: on a first-name basis with aliens, lizard creatures, and always looking for galactic answers to earthly mysteries.
You're the opportunistic type: as a kid, you believed in the Easter Bunny for the longest time, now you don't even trust the stock market news anymore
You're the anarchist type: it's always the government's fault, because the government itself always blames the wrong people
You're the paranoid type: The powerful are only out to get you because you've gotten in their way more than once.